I wanted to share Tracy and Toru’s touching story in Asian Jewish Life, called “Learning to Speak: A cross-cultural love story.” She tells several instances that illustrate the strong impact that her husband’s sweetly skewed words have had on her.
These are the tales I usually tell when people ask if it’s hard to be married to a man whose native language I don’t share. I explain that from the moment Toru announced his love for me, five years ago, with an accent I could barely follow but an earnestness I couldn’t resist, I’ve delighted, rather than despaired, when words have failed us.
Considering that Tracy has a PhD in English, words are no joke for her, so it’s rather incredible to read that she succumbed to a power beyond verbal communication. To be able to discard an investment in language and plunge into the unknown space of higher meaning takes real courage.
There is a stark contrast between her experience and mine. I used to feel extremely frustrated by the slightest mis-communication between my husband and I. Usually I would blame it on the language barrier, and fail to recognize my lack of patience and understanding. Fortunately things have improved remarkably! Still, we most likely have at least one glitch per conversation…
We are certainly more attuned to one another now; it feels like we’ve become one at times. Often we think the same thing at the same moment, we are more compassionate of one another. I attribute these changes fully to our practice of Isha Yoga together.
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